HEY EVERYONE! Jessica Wakefield is TOTALLY EFFING BATSHIT CRAZY!
Now that I have your attention by just all-caps repeating what we already knew, it’s time for the next great Sweet Valley mini-series … *drumroll* … Sweet Valley Scandal! As the back of this book tells us, “Sweet Valley has never been so shocked!” I very much doubt that! This mini-series is mercifully only 2 books long, which is good because I’m still feeling like nothing’s going to top that silly-ass werewolf bullshit.
Our story opens after the twins have flown home from London. It’s still summertime, and they’re on the beach babbling about their wolf-man adventures with Lila and Enid. Since Jessica doesn’t really want to hang out with freakin’ Enid, she convinces Lila to go jogging on the beach with her so they can gossip. The girls are talking about how they need some new guys because it’s been a whole two days since Jessica was dating anyone, when just then! An errant Frisbee hits Jess in the head and knocks her ass over. Two hot men run over to apologize. The one who threw the Frisbee at Jessica introduces himself as Robby Goodman and offers to buy her a soda, which Jessica turns down. So he goes off with Lila (more about that later), and the older one takes one look at Jess, and they fall head over heels in love at first sight. No, seriously, that’s what we’re supposed to believe happens. They barely said one word to each other. They kiss, but then he flips out and says they can’t be doing this and runs away. Jessica goes back to Liz and Enid and cries she’s met the first man she ever loved since Sam. For fuck’s sake, it was quite literally the last book in which she told Liz the same thing about Robert Pembroke! Now she’s all, “Oh, Robert and I knew it would never last.” Haha, okay, that’s not what you were thinking while imagining yourself becoming Lady Pembroke, Jessica!
Back at the Wakefield house, the days go by and Jessica continues to obsess over her stupid mystery man whose name she doesn’t even know. But Alice Wakefield has some news. You see, apparently Alice’s college roommate, Nancy Marest Gibbons, passed away 3 months ago, devastating Alice. Now Nancy’s daughter, Sue Gibbons, is engaged to be married and she’s contacted Alice about having a California beach wedding or something. So Alice wants to invite Sue to live with them for the next month or so and plan the perfect Sweet Valley wedding, because in this world all weddings take only about a month tops to plan (and if you’re in London, it’s only a couple of days!). The twins think that sounds great and are eager to play wedding planner (again!). Liz even remarks on how of course she can help because she helped plan Mona Whitman’s wedding. So, Sue flies in from New York and moves into Steven’s room, because Steven is away at school. I guess he’s doing summer school. Now that he’s got Billie, maybe he actually doesn’t want to come home every weekend.
We learn that Sue’s only eighteen and her fiance, Jeremy Randall, is 23. Apparently Sue is taking a gap year between high school and college to work an internship in NYC at a conservation group called Project Nature, and that’s how she and Jeremy met. They worked a lot together and got close, so now they’ve decided they may as well tie the knot. Gee, how romantic. When the twins wonder why someone would want to get married so young, Alice does some babbling about how Sue is grieving her mother’s death and so getting married and having kids of her own is probably going to help her get over it. WTF? Anybody ever hear of grief counseling in this damn series? (No, unless the counseling is provided by teenagers at Project Youth) When Sue talks about being engaged, she hints at the twins that they had to get married before they ended up getting “in trouble.” If you’ve seen Dirty Dancing, you know she means “knocked up.” Jessica is jealous that Sue is only 18 and already planning a wedding. I’m having such a hard time buying that Jessica would act like this normally. I guess we could say it’s because she’s still suffering over Sam, but she’s had plenty of flighty adventures since then.
Sue is obnoxiously sweet and, of course, loves everything about Sweet Valley and the twins. However, I feel like we’re supposed to pick up on some kind of hint that Sue isn’t what she seems. Several such “hints” are dropped when the twins show Sue the Sweet Valley Mall and start talking about shopping for the wedding. First of all, Sue is delighted that they can just drive everywhere, which is so un-environmentally friendly for someone working for a conservation org. Then the girls discuss where Sue should register for wedding gifts. As Jessica and Liz are arguing whether Sue will want practical gifts or expensive gifts like china, crystal, and silver – in front of Sue, like she’s not there! – Sue shocks both of them by saying she wants the expensive stuff and Jeremy can have the practical stuff and that she can’t wait to “make out like a bandit.” When they discuss where the couple should go for their honeymoon, Jessica says Paris would be romantic, and Sue agrees. Then Liz barks at Jess – again, in front of Sue, like Sue’s not there – that because Jeremy and Sue work for a conservation non-profit, she’s sure they would rather go somewhere that they can work, like Costa Rica, even though Sue LITERALLY JUST SAID she loves the idea of Paris! Sue meekly agrees that maybe Liz is right. You know, because people who work for non-profits are supposed to be complete martyrs and ignore self-care in favor of working every chance they get. Shut the fuck up, Liz! This is one of many hints that we receive that Sue has no real sense of self. Either that, or she’s a wolf in sheep’s clothing. Since it’s Sweet Valley, I really have no idea which one it is. Or, you know, she could just be a typical 18-year-old. I know some people mature fast at 18, but I also know we’re not about to find any real-to-life examples of such folks in a Sweet Valley High book.
As the last stop on their mall sojourn, the twins head to the jewelry counter so Sue can look at engagement rings. It seems Jeremy didn’t have time to get her one yet, so Liz wants to see what Sue likes so she can make a mental note to tell Jeremy later. The three girls decide to have some fun by each picking out the engagement ring they would want and showing it to the others. Liz picks a pearl ring, Jessica picks a sapphire ring, and Sue picks a giant diamond solitaire. Of course, there’s a lot of talk about how ostentatious this ring is and more utter shock on the part of Liz at how Sue seems to have expensive tastes. Liz is just dying to find things to look down her nose at people for, without actually offering any real assistance, like talking about a budget. Later on, Sue tells Liz that her father was never able to give her mother a proper ring, so that’s why the ring is so important to her. Now Liz feels (mildly) ashamed.
Jeremy flies into town from New York and comes over to the Wakefield house to have dinner … and surprise, Jeremy Randall is the same guy that Jess kissed on the beach. Jessica is shocked out of her gourd as Sue screams with glee at the sight of him and throws herself into his arms. Jessica runs off to the bathroom to throw water on her face and have a minor breakdown. At the dinner table, she has to listen to them excitedly talk about wedding plans, of course, egged on by everyone else. It seems Sue wanted to get married at a big cathedral in town or something, but Jeremy wants to do a beach wedding so that’s what they’re doing. After dinner, the couple leave to go make out at the beach (that’s basically what they tell everyone they’re doing), and Jessica breaks down and tearfully tells Liz that Jeremy is the guy who kissed her. Liz says maybe Jeremy was just sowing one last wild oat and is moving on now and that Jess should too. She also blames Sue for the incident: “If Sue were really strong within herself, maybe Jeremy wouldn’t be attracted to other women.” She’s on some dumb kick about self-empowerment for women, and I guess self-empowerment for women means blaming yourself when your partner can’t stay faithful to you. Liz then starts preaching about Jessica being attracted to men who are already taken because Jessica is also not “strong within herself”. So Jessica throws Liz’s bullshit right back in her face by reminding her of how she went after Bruce Patman even though he was dating Pamela. Liz starts making stupid excuses about how that was DIFFERENT. Hahahaha, hypocrite Liz is not strong within herself. (Wait till we get to the sub-plot!)
Jessica can’t get over this dude to whom she’s barely spoken two whole sentences, so she launches a plan to steal him from Sue. The morning after the dinner, Jessica wakes up to find a note on the kitchen table from Liz, who says she’s taken Sue to the “Fern Street Bookshop” to buy a wedding planner, and she’ll be back later to pick her up and then go get Jeremy. But when Jeremy calls, Jessica lies and says that Liz is going to meet them at the mall so they can show him the ring Sue liked and tells him to come over so she can take him there. On the way to the mall, Jeremy tries to talk to her about their kiss on the beach, but Jessica plays dumb. When they get to the jewelry store, she has Jeremy guess which ring Sue wanted and he chooses the one Jessica liked. The saleslady, assuming Jessica is Jeremy’s fiancee, then has Jessica try it on. Awkward! I like the way there wasn’t a salesperson to be found when the three girls were in there earlier. Jessica shows Jeremy the ring Sue really chose and he buys it, with his “eyes widening at the price.” Jessica then admits that she lied to Jeremy about Liz meeting them, because she wanted them to be alone together. Oh yeah, they also run into Bruce Patman and Jessica tells him to get lost.
Back at the Wakefield homestead, Sue mentions that she and Jeremy are going to eat dinner at the Carousel restaurant that night, so Jessica quickly starts calling up random guys to take her there so she can attempt to make Jeremy jealous. Aaron, A.J., and Winston all turn her down, but she manages to convince Bruce Patman of all people, even though he mentions he’s got to be careful because he nearly lost Pamela after he was running around with the other Wakefield. (And even though Jessica was just super rude to him in front of Jeremy at the mall.) Bruce tells Jessica she’ll have to pay for the dinner herself even though he’s filthy rich. For the date, Jessica borrows Liz’s aquamarine silk sheath with a matching bolero jacket with “white piping.” That’s a uh, interesting picture. At the restaurant, Bruce pisses Jessica off by ordering all sorts of expensive shit off the menu. They argue at the table while simultaneously trying to fake looking romantic because Sue and Jeremy are watching them (with great interest, since Jessica was just rude to Bruce at the mall earlier). It’s actually pretty funny. When Jessica realizes Jeremy is about to present Sue with the engagement ring over at their table, she runs over to interrupt them. Sue invites them to sit down and have dessert with them, and Jeremy starts getting pissy at Bruce and making dumb threats about how he’d better treat Jessica right. Jessica loves it, of course. Jeremy and Bruce act like they’re about to come to blows, so Jessica and Bruce leave without ordering dessert and it’s not even clear Jessica paid for their meal. Sue doesn’t seem super disturbed by the fact her fiance was about to punch out some guy he just met.
Jessica finishes the night off by giving Bruce a kiss on the mouth for no apparent reason. I guess she either forgot nosy Caroline Pearce lives in her neighborhood, or she thought it would be cool if Pamela had another Wakefield-twin related reason to dump Bruce again.
The next morning at breakfast, Sue gleefully shows off her engagement ring while Jessica searches for some cereal that “isn’t good for you” to get over her pain. Haha! A couple days previous, she was eating “medicinal ice cream”. Isn’t this the type of eating that Liz and Jess were always looking down their noses at Robin Wilson and Lois Waller for doing? Liz and Jess then take Sue out shopping for bridal gowns. They end up at a shop called Bridal Glory where Jess tries to push the ugliest dresses she can find on Sue, while Liz gives Jess the evil eye. Sue finally finds a great dress that looks good on her. She also exposes that Jessica was with Bruce at the restaurant last night by trying to gossip about it with the twins. Liz figures out what Jessica was up to and is pissed as hell that Jess was obviously trying to mess shit up – especially because Sue just asked both twins to be her bridesmaids, because of course she did!
Liz takes Sue to look at possible beaches for the wedding site, where Sue frets about what will happen if it rains on her wedding day, and mentions maybe the cathedral wedding she wanted with the country club reception would be better. Liz encourages Sue to do what she wants, but then Sue relents and reiterates that she wants whatever type of wedding Jeremy wants. OK, I’m confused. So Sue voices that she wants more expensive options for the ring, the honeymoon, the registry, etc. and Liz looks down on her for that and pushes more economical options, but then when Sue starts talking about wanting a wedding that’s probably going to cost more, Liz is all about how Sue should do what she wants. What? I like how Liz is mad that Jess is trying to interfere with the wedding and can’t just mind her own business, while Liz herself has her own special brand of interference. Although, I gotta say, apparently Jeremy is paying for everything. What kind of non-profit does this man work at?
Meanwhile, Jessica gets a manicure and then comes home to take a swim, which is interrupted by Alice Wakefield and Jeremy. Alice is fretting because she was supposed to take Jeremy to the caterers to meet Sue and Liz for an appointment, but now she has to go do some other shit and needs Jessica to take him. Jess is only too happy. Jeremy drives, and she “accidentally” directs him to Miller’s Point instead. Jeremy is a moron and/or a total cad, so he, a full-grown man, starts wheedling at this 16-year-old girl about how he can’t stand the way she looks at him, then starts kissing her, while babbling about how he’s supposed to marry Sue. I guess we’re supposed to see Jessica as the femme fatale here, but Jeremy is no better. Jessica starts playing hard-to-get again and directs him to leave and gets them to the caterers, late of course. Liz gives Jessica the side-eye because she knows there’s no way Jessica was really “lost”. Liz and Jess listen to Sue and Jeremy argue about what to serve at the wedding. Sue wants lobster, but she also wants champagne, and Jeremy says their budget can’t cover both. He suggests they have chicken if champagne is important to Sue, even though she’s not of age to drink (as he points out, most guests won’t be). Haha, I don’t think anyone really monitors your age at a wedding. Sue finally agrees that chicken and champagne makes sense, and they seem happy.
After the catering meeting, the gang goes to the Dairi Burger where they sit with Robby and Lila, and Jeremy salivates over Jessica licking strawberry milkshake off of her mouth. Then everyone sees Bruce come in with Pamela which raises the ire of Jeremy and Sue since they still think Bruce is Jessica’s steady man. Jessica tries to keep Jeremy and Sue from calling Bruce over to their table, and claims Bruce and Pam are just friends, but then Bruce kisses Pammy. Sue and Jeremy are upset & Jeremy wants to go over and punch Bruce in the face or something because he has some kind of anger management problem. He makes a big deal out of how Jessica doesn’t deserve to be treated that way. Jessica snaps at him and makes a dramatic statement that she does in fact deserve to be loved by someone who loves her and her alone, but that Jeremy is hardly the person to teach Bruce that lesson. Sue looks on with bewilderment, totally confused but ultimately suspecting nothing. EARTH TO SUE. YOU ARE NOT “STRONG WITHIN YOURSELF.”
The next day, Sue takes Liz and Jess bridesmaids’ dress shopping. I should note that Sue does have girl friends flying in from NYC for the wedding, but she’d still rather have the twins stand up for her. She also wastes no time talking about how the twins’ coloring means they’ll end up looking good in anything. It wouldn’t be an SVH book without some kind of reminder that the twins look perfect. Sue picks peach bridesmaids’ dresses, which Jessica starts to insult, until Liz takes her aside and gives her a talking-to. She threatens Jessica by saying if she doesn’t start behaving, Liz will convince Sue that she and Jeremy should elope, and I guess it goes without saying that Sue will be convinced. Oh my god, there’s so much wrong with this fucking story. Run, Sue, run.
Liz’s threats scare Jessica, so she agrees to get the peach bridesmaid’s dress. The ladies then pick up Sue’s dress along with a heap of other accessories. As they walk back to the Jeep, Sue makes a remark about hoping Jeremy likes her bridal underthings, reminding Jessica that newlyweds do often have sex on the wedding night. Jessica flips the fuck out and reacts by deliberately TOSSING SUE’S WEDDING DRESS RIGHT IN THE PATH OF A PICK-UP TRUCK, AND WATCHING IT GET RUN OVER. Oh my GOD. Jessica needs HELP. Sue flips out screaming while Jessica pretends it was an accident, that her arms just magically sprung outward and flung a dress for no real reason. Back home, Alice determines the dress is actually not ruined, just really dirty. Yeah, okay. Alice makes Jessica pay to have the dress dry-cleaned herself, and Jessica pouts because she’s already broke from buying Bruce dinner. But if you think Jessica has hit rock bottom … oh wait, it gets worse!
Sue and Jeremy go to the mall to register for wedding gifts. Recounting this trip to the twins and Alice later, Sue later gets upset because Jeremy thought the china pattern she picked out was “tacky” and he didn’t want any crystal on the registry at all. She starts bawling over it, and Alice reassures her it’s “cold feet.” Alice, Sue, and Liz then leave the house to go run wedding errands while Jessica makes excuses to stay at home. Jeremy is supposed to call later when he’s able to meet up with the others, and Jessica promises to direct him to meet the others when he calls, and once again no one but Liz is suspicious of Jessica’s shit. So Jeremy calls and Jessica tells him to come on over because the others will be back soon. Jeremy is all like “Huh that’s not what Sue said earlier, but I’m sure this isn’t suspicious at all, either that or I just really want to hop in Jessica’s pants.” He shows up with his tux because he wanted to try it on and see how it looks with Sue’s dress – is that really necessary? Jess has him try it on, claiming that this way Sue can see it as soon as she gets back to the house. Jessica then runs upstairs and puts on Sue’s bridal outfit – headpiece, dress, everything – and comes downstairs in it! OH MY GOD THIS IS SOME STALKER BULLSHIT. She then throws herself at Jeremy telling him she knows he loves her and starts kissing him. When he seems less than enthusiastic, she starts bawling hysterically. They end up having a heartfelt talk on the couch and snuggling in Sue’s fucking wedding dress while Jeremy admits he does love Jessica but insists he’s got to marry Sue and begs Jessica to forget him. Jessica reluctantly goes upstairs and tries to get the dress off before the others come back, but the zipper is stuck because, get this, the dress is too small for her! Too small for a Wakefield? Never in a million years did I think these books would actually admit that someone is more petite than a Wakefield twin. Ultimately, Liz has to help Jessica out of the dress, and the zipper sticks and tears so now Liz has to mend it for her pathetic ass sister. It’s times like these that I can either totally see why I’m still doing this SVH series project, or don’t understand why I’m doing it at all!
To help Jessica get over Jeremy, Liz goes to the library, finds a research paper that Jeremy and Sue worked on together, photocopies it, then comes home and shoves the photocopied papers in her sister’s face. She tells Jessica that while Jeremy may not be that crazy about Sue, they obviously have a great deal in common! Yes, that’s a great reason to MARRY SOMEBODY. I HATE YOU LIZ. Somebody PLEASE tell Sue about her damn fiance already!
The Wakefields host an engagement party for Sue and Jeremy at their house, and Jessica puts on some dress that’s supposed to make her look super hot. It’s the one that’s on the cover … not impressed. At the party, Jessica dances with Bruce while Winston dances with Pam, and Jeremy gets jealous. Then Sue stupidly suggests that Jessica should dance with Jeremy. Sue, please make like Sherlock Holmes and get a clue. As they dance, Jeremy tells Jessica how jealous he is of Bruce, and Jessica finally admits they aren’t really dating. Jeremy then moans that he wants to be alone with Jess, so she takes him to some tall hedge on the Wakefield property that we’re just now hearing about. They make out while listening to the partygoers run around trying to find Jeremy for some toast they’re about to have for Sue and Jeremy. Nice!
The sub-plots: There are two. In the first one, Lila gets involved with Jeremy’s friend Robby Goodman (the one who threw the Frisbee at Jessica). He’s 20 and an artist, and supposedly super wealthy. He’s staying at his parents’ mansion for the summer and driving their Lambo … or so he says. Lila and Robby fall in love, but then Lila learns he’s not at all wealthy; in fact he’s really struggling financially as an artist, trying to put himself through school, and just house-sitting for some rich family, or something like that. Lila can’t stand the thought of dating someone who’s not rich, so she dumps Robby. I think she should be more concerned that he lied to her and only revealed the truth once she loved him. Not to worry, Jessica helps get them back together at the engagement party. How nice of her, I guess?
The second sub-plot is hysterical, and so appropriate for Liz. Due to Sweet Valley’s continuous efforts to show that people really do suffer following traumatic events, Liz is having difficulty getting over the fact that she cheated on Todd with a guy who turned out to be a serial killer. (Todd, by the way, is presently away for two weeks visiting his grandma.) Of course, they gloss over the whole “cheated on” part. To try to understand why she trusted a guy who believes in werewolves, Liz starts reading self-help books, and goes on a “self-realization” trip. She starts quoting the books at Jessica extensively, and encouraging her and Sue to get in touch with their “primal woman.” She invites Sue to a special gathering: “Some of my friends and I are going to get together for a girls-only evening to explore our relationships – not only with one another, but with our boyfriends, too.” When I first read that line I thought Liz was hosting an orgy, but the girls are actually just getting together to read from their self-empowerment books and encourage each other, or something. You know how Liz loves to lecture people, so this shit starts getting old real quick. Liz makes Jess so mad at one point that Jess snatches her book away and throws it down the staircase, accidentally (sure!) hitting Sue in the head.
The most hilarious scene occurs when, hoping to help Jessica get over Jeremy, Liz
invites drags her to a “primal woman” session held at the local rec center, based off of the book Primal Woman, Woman of Strength. I think maybe they’re doing a parody of the Susan Powter book that was so popular around this time, but I’m really not sure. The Primal Woman session leader has everyone sit in a circle on the floor around a hibachi, which is supposed to represent an ancient fire circle, and everyone receives a fake animal fur to put on. The leader tells them they need to choose new names for themselves to take back their power from the patriarchy. The idea is that your last name, one way or the other, comes from a man’s last name, since last names are traditionally passed down from father to daughter, and never mother to daughter (or not in this group anyway). And so now you’re supposed to take back the power by picking your own name. The session leader calls on Jessica, who says she wants to be known as just “Jessica” a la Cher, Madonna, or Sade, and the session leader has some kind of problem with Jessica just dropping her last name, EVEN THOUGH THAT MATCHES THE WHOLE LINE OF THOUGHT THAT WAS JUST PRESENTED TO EVERYONE. OH MY GOD I’M SO CONFUSED. Liz, meanwhile, declares that her new name is Runs-with-the-Wind. Hahaha, I was about to Run-to-the-Toilet to pee myself laughing the first time I read that shit. Oh my lord, if Liz starts making people call her that in real life … please let this happen in the next book, or don’t, I don’t know if my wine budget (and bladder) are big enough to get me through this shit. The other ladies choose names like Shakara, Lion-Woman, Fire-Maker, Flower-in-the-Sun, and Kolanda and it feels like everyone is just doing some kind of weird pseudo-cultural appropriation. Finally, the session lady encourages everyone to stand up one by one, and unleash their best primal woman scream. When she calls on “Runs-with-the-Wind”, Liz ends up doing a super loud, long, ear piercing scream and I want to plug my ears just thinking about it. Seriously, she can run-to-the-garbage with that bullshit. Jessica renames her “Hurricane-Lungs”.
Sue later says she wishes she could have gone to the primal woman session, because it sounds “so interesting” and yeah, she’s definitely not sorry she couldn’t go. Later on, Enid and Liz lament that they might have to move one of their own “sessions” to accommodate hosting a surprise bridal shower for Sue, and I’m getting worried they might decide to combine the two and gift Sue with nothing but fake animal furs, primal woman books, and a hibachi.
So yeah, now we know what “female empowerment” Liz looks like and it’s utterly useless when it comes to truly helping women. Just stick my finger into an outlet and call me shocked. Oh yeah, and at one point Liz talks to Todd on the phone and tells him she’s been hanging out with her girlfriends and talking about female empowerment, and he gets THREATENED. He says she should be able to share all her problems with him alone, and not with her girlfriends, and tells her that if he wanted to talk to his guy friends about problems and not her, she’d call him sexist. Liz, just throw the whole man away.
On the cover: I had to read the book to understand who’s who. At first I thought that was Jessica plastering herself against the glass to glare at Sue and Jeremy making out, or maybe Sue glaring at Jessica and Jeremy. Nope! Based on the outfits and the hair, it’s Jessica and Jeremy kissing at the engagement party, while fuckin’ Liz is glaring at them through the glass and looks like she’s either plotting to strangle them with that string of lanterns, or maybe do a primal woman scream at them. But in the book itself, Liz doesn’t see them kissing (unless that’s going to be revealed in the next book) because they’re in a damn hedge, not out in the open on the patio!
Other stuff: The Beach Disco now seems to be called the Beach Cafe, or maybe those are two different things.
At the start of the book, Jessica is now big into using sunscreen because she likes the pale look she attained in London.
Lila calls Todd a “drip” and says that Liz’s problem is she’s been dating him for way too long. NAILED IT.
Bruce refers to Pamela as “the only sane girl I’ve ever dated.” Damn, he just slammed everyone on the planet, including his sweet dead girlfriend Regina, whom he totally fucked over. I’M STILL PISSED.
Books that Liz, Enid, Penny, and Cheryl consult to learn how to become empowered women include:
- Real Women, Bad Men
- Primal Woman, Woman of Strength
- Attracting the Love You Want
- An unspecified book about African-American women’s issues.
The books with titles all seem to be fictional, which I wanted to check since the series recently featured a real astrology book. The third book is probably based on the real-life book Getting the Love You Want.
When Jeremy and Sue argue at the caterer’s, the caterer tries to mediate by saying “Children, children.”
There’s a scene where Sue tells the Wakefields that Jeremy is helping Robby change the oil in a car, “or some manly thing like that.” I like how empowered woman Liz says nothing in return.
In one of the scenes where Jessica gets Jeremy to come to the Wakefield house while Jessica is there alone, she considers being out front soaping up the Jeep and dripping wet when he arrives.
We learn that the Carousel is Jessica’s favorite restaurant, despite the fact it’s so freakin’ expensive. I guess she never had to pay her own way there before.
In one of my favorite scenes in the whole book, Lila and Robby show up at the Carousel for dinner and unexpectedly run into Jessica and Bruce as they’re there trying to show off for Jeremy and Sue. Lila expresses shock at seeing the two of them together and remarks that if Bruce were there with Liz, she’d understand. OW, I felt the heat from that burn.
We also learn that Lila Fowler hates jogging which doesn’t surprise me at all.
Sue seems to have chosen Moon Beach as the wedding site. Moon Beach is the same one featured prominently in The New Elizabeth.
From the mouth of Lila Fowler: “Oh, shut up. You know I get plenty of exercise. I must have gone around the entire mall twice yesterday, looking for a new pair of sandals.”
Coming up next: We find out if this story ends with Jessica bringing a knife to Sue and Jeremy’s nuptials!
Fun fact: I marked my place in this book with a bookmark I’d saved from the copy of 1994 Hotscopes Leo I purchased at Waldenbooks 25 years ago, which would’ve been several months before this SVH book came out. Anyone remember the Hotscopes books? They had daily horoscopes for teens. I don’t have my copy anymore unless it’s hiding somewhere!